Movie Hopping 2006: The Year of Shit (#1-5)

Stay tuned next week for the top movies of 2006. The crew at PDL will compile a list of 40+ movies that took place in 2006, some of which were seen during movie hoppings, and some of which were seen at home on DVD.

Well, the top 5 movies in the movie hopping experience of 2006 were quite enjoyable:

1. Match Point

Quite Possibly the highlight of Woody Allen's career (yes I am aware of his rampage of brilliance in the 70's). He creates a topnotch thriller out of a cliche subject matter in this glorious celebration of romance. The movie is very mild, not overdone, and casted casted well. The final portion of the movie literally caused my jaw to hang for 20 minutes.

2. Departed, The

A gangster movie that takes place in the modern era. Scorsese is in his comfort zone; the east coast, guns, and villains. This cast is packed with talent, every lead actor, and every supporting actor is top notch; there is no question Mark Walburg steals the show despite his limited screen time. And the end is timeless signature Scorsesien mastership; never dull; they all kill each other Shakespeare-style.

3. Capote

Seymour Hoffman. Need I say more? This guy is great in any role he takes. This movie is very slow, boring, and colorless (in black and white), but Hoffman shines. The story deals with emotion, guilt, and humanity. These types of movies can be very shitty, very easily. This movie is quite good in telling its story, and keeps you interested throughout. The exploration of humanity is the focus of this movie, and it would not be crazy if in the end you forgive the two brutal murderers, and instead view their punishment as the true bad guy.



4. Blood Diamond

This movie takes us on a fast and action packed journey that is boring for like 2 seconds. The other 66391 seconds are sheer high-flying, anti-Bolshevik notes that only a composer of the highest rank could write. And the pleasant surprise is: this isn't a dumbed down action movie. The is great in all aspects; cinematography, acting, plot, etc.. A very effective movie, and one of the great surprises of 2006. Leo rules in this one.

5. V for Vendetta

Orwell's Animal Farm meets 1984, and an old friend Fahrenheit 451 . They go to a dinner together consisting of A Clockwork Orange, Kill Bill and any other sensible form of madness. What you get is V for Vendetta, the latest political commentary on capitalism, rules, and power. This is one of the most original concepts of the year (prolly second to Pan's Labyrinth), not because of the storyline, but because of the almost fantasy-like experience the viewer goes on. The choreography is great, the violence is great, and the British atmosphere is perfect. Upon watching this movie you cant help but say to yourself "Remember remember the fifth of November..."

Movie Hopping 2006: The Year of Shit (#6-11)

Greetings my friend. Here are the movies "in the middle". Stanislav actually offered to discuss the movies in this slot, but I actually didn't think these movies were as bad as he made them sound, so I decided to do it myself. These movies were fairly enjoyable (and not bad), but they also were nothing special. The James Bond movie was the best Bond in the last 3 decades, and greatly revitalized the series. The Pursuit of Happyness was a great story, and it really showed that Denzel Washington can be a good actor with the proper situation (an Halle Berry, as always, did not disappoint) . Finally the Good Sheppard was a good effort, but resulted in a mediocre movie; De Niro had very few flaws in his movie, but the subject matter was just too boring; I look forward to future movies by him.

6. Casino Royal
7. Illusionist, The
8. Pursuit of Happyness
9. Borat
10. The Good Sheppard
11. Prestige, The

Movie Hopping 2006: The Year of Shit (#12-22)

The movies of 2006 are comparable to the sickness of a an obese, pale, fool who is not only plagued with AIDS and leprosy, but with and gonorrhea and dandruff. This was a case of sheer blasphemy in its highest and most pure form. Here is the list:

12. Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
13. Lucky number Slevin
14. MI:3
15. Happy Feet
16. Apocalypto
17. Inside man
18. Superman Returns
19. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
20. She’s the Man
21. Rocky 6
22. Snakes on a Plane

Many disappointments were found throughout the craptastic movies. First of all, the nudity and the running scenes in Apocalypto were to subtle. I have been waiting years for a good tribal porno; nothing beats some good old unwashed brown tits combined with naked men running through jungles for 3 hours. However, I could have used more of it.

Rocky 6 hit home with me. A drunk old man, stumbling on the streets talking about "this and that" and "the geography of the buses", and "you gotta do whats right..." really was touching. The scenes reminded me of when I escaped from a gulag in my youth; the weakness in my legs (due to malnutrition) caused me to stumble around like an autistic deer, and the massive amounts of vodka caused me to talk like Stallone.

But, worst of all was the Negro movie; Snakes on a Plane. After watching this movie, I thank Lenin for his efforts of banning all Negroes and Jews from the Motherland. A sickness of a pain forms in your heart and skull upon seeing the first 10 minutes of the movie. Unfortunately the movie is about 80 minutes long. After watching this garbage-wrath of humanity, I had to be restrained by police and security for a vision of Stalin came before me saying "Kill every black, yellow, brown and Jew-looking human you see".